Lost it a bit when Simon (& Jasper) were peripherally involved in an accident on the A329 last night - mum came over to calm me down. Still I’m not phoning NHS direct every day & am continuing to allowing Claudia to leave the house - so I’m doing pretty well.

Claudia decided yesterday she wanted to go and stay with MIL for ‘four days’, so she is! I really need some time not being cheerful, I’m so tired it’s all unreal. Settled solidly in numb with brief flashes of sad.

Have a new plan - to be referred to the Silver Star Unit in Oxford. I think I meet their criteria with

“High blood pressure in pregnancy”
“Previous stillborn babies”*
“Recurrent miscarriages or other early pregnancy losses.”
“Previous severe bleeding (placental abruption)”
“Previous early labour”**
“Any other unusually complicated or stressful previous pregnancy.”

This bit sounds good though

We run:
* A pre-pregnancy clinic where advice about another pregnancy can be given and appropriate care planned.
* A recurrent miscarriage clinic, usually limited to women who have suffered at least three early pregnancy losses.
* An early pregnancy clinic, where women who suffer recurrent miscarriages can be guided through the early weeks of their next pregnancy.
* The Silver Star clinic, where full antenatal care is given at a very high level to those who need it.

I need to see if I can get referred without going via GP (unlikely).

* well Toby was ‘just’ a late miscarriage …
** 35+6 weeks is technically preterm